Creativity: A grand promise loss & life hold

Loss is a door: 10 years ago, these words would have made little sense to me. I would have brushed them aside without thought or considered them as some abstract philosophical concept that my father so often spoke about.

Today, I see them in a different light. I now believe that loss, pain, grief, misery, hurt, sadness, melancholy and so on are human conditions which — when channelised — have the power to reveal our deepest creative potential.

Creation needs to emerge from the core, the very bowels of Existence. And, pain of any kind — physical, mental-emotional or existential — provides the environment for that inward journey.

For me, the loss occurred unannounced and unapologetic, changing everything in a heartbeat. A newly turned septuagenarian full of beans, my father bid his final goodbye quite suddenly on a fine April Monday in 2017. I was shattered.

As a yogasana practitioner, I had relied on movement, breathing and stillness to navigate difficulties. However, as much as I tried, I couldn’t process this loss with the tools I had. I began listening to prayers, mantras (chants), and talks by spiritual masters — to understand why — to get some answers to all those questions that were crowding my mind.

Most days, I sat motionless on my yoga mat: overwhelmed by memories, feelings of anger, frustration, vulnerability, hopelessness, and sadness like I had never experienced before.

A door opened

It was during this time that I stumbled upon the Samkhya philosophy — the theoretical basis of yoga — and something clicked.

I was fascinated by how life was defined simply as an interplay between purusha (pure consciousness) and prakriti (matter). Delving into its explanations, I slowly learned about Life and its unavoidable end, at a tangible level.

My explorations into philosophy continued. And with time, I noticed that my approach towards teaching yogasana expanded dramatically beyond its physical realm. Experiences with loss and pain had led to fundamental changes in my way of being and interacting with the world, and I was astonished to see that this resonated with those coming for my yogasana classes. The energy was different.

I also got back to creating art. Sketching had always been my refuge, a profoundly meditative process for me. I started writing again and dabbled in poetry, joining a community of committed writers who further inspired me to create.

Following these pursuits became a highly enriching and healing experience. Also at times, I realise that I am speaking my father’s language now.

I wasn’t the only one

Sarah Herasme has a similar story to share. Her brother, who was her favourite artist, passed away in 2022. “He was my biggest cheerleader to get my hands into art and practice,” she says. For a year, she found herself taking care of all the administrative things that follow someone’s passing. “I had not stopped to mourn, and it started weighing heavily on me,” she recalls.

She decided to quit her job in 2023 and found a course, where people from the European Institute of Applied Buddhism (Plum Village) were holding a calligraphy retreat in Germany. “I decided to try it even though just getting there was difficult. I remember driving my small car through a storm with big trucks around,” she shares.

The retreat was entirely designed around silence and art — calligraphy. “I was forced to be with my thoughts a lot. I had always loved calligraphy but the moment I grabbed a brush and put ink to paper, I felt a flood of emotions in me.” That day, she cried and doodled the whole time — letting out everything that she was holding in.

“Little by little over four days, I found my rhythm and my own script emerged,” she says, recalling how beautiful it felt to find that connection with her brother. “I still feel it when I make beautiful things.”

Sarah recently taught at her first calligraphy workshop during the annual Day of Well-Being and Creativity by Tulipane Design. “It opened my eyes to many such fascinating opportunities,” she says. Sarah has decided to share her love for this art form with more enthusiasts.

And so it is with Creativity. It holds this grand promise of a homecoming — of becoming who we were always meant to be. Only if we are able and willing to dip into our Source — that pristine, boundless inner well that we all possess.

-          By Mallika Rale, Yogasana trainer, writer, hopeful artist https://www.instagram.com/mallikarale/