“Check Me Like an Empress”: Breaking the Chains of Shame and Embracing Emotional Liberation

For the occasion of the launch of our Summer collection, we joined Ateliers Gango for a workshop on shame and how to increase our self-confidence as women. We discovered an amazing book, exchanged about our insecurities and excercised gratitude.

In a world where women are often encouraged to shrink themselves—emotionally, physically, and socially— the concept Check Me Like an Empress invites us to take up space unapologetically. Rooted in the mission of Ateliers Gango, an inclusive and participatory space of sisterhood, this powerful initiative weaves collective healing, emotional emancipation, and feminist empowerment into one transformative journey.

Reclaiming the Narrative: From Shame to Freedom

At the heart of this movement lies the book La Fabrique de la Honte (The Factory of Shame) by Élisabeth Cadoche and Anne de Montarlot. This work deconstructs how shame has been historically manufactured as a tool of domination and control over women. Far from being just a private emotion, shame is a socially constructed mechanism—a byproduct of patriarchal systems that seek to define what a woman should be, feel, and desire.

According to the authors, shame is not innate, but learned. It is often assigned to women’s bodies, their emotions, their motherhood (or lack thereof), their responses to violence, and even their autonomy. This internalized shame becomes multidimensional, interweaving across various aspects of identity, often to the point of invisibilizing women altogether.

But the most radical takeaway? Shame doesn’t always yield to pride—it yields to freedom.

“Le contraire de la honte n’est pas toujours la fierté. C’est toujours, en revanche, la LIBERTÉ.”

Safe Spaces and Emotional Empowerment

In Jamaica and beyond, the Check Me Like an Empress initiative centers on group discussions—not debates—where women gather in safe spaces that prioritize active listening, confidentiality, and emotional expression. These are not forums for correction or judgment. They are radical containers for self-expression where participants speak in “I,” refrain from interruption, and honor each other’s truth.

I like co-organising workshops with Gango because they work under the principles of popular education, encouraging lifelong learning and collective consciousness. Participants begin to recognize patterns of oppression—many of which operate invisibly—and learn to dismantle them from within.

Tools to Break the Cycle of Shame

In the book, Cadoche and de Montarlot propose a holistic array of practices to disarm shame’s hold over our lives:

• Knowledge is Power: Understanding systemic mechanisms of shame helps us reject them.

• Reconnect with the Body: Through breathwork, meditation, yoga, dance—our bodies become allies, not battlegrounds.

• Practice Self-Compassion: Turning kindness inward counters years of self-blame and internalized judgment.

• Therapy and Emotional Expression: Naming our emotions reduces their power; expressing them frees us.

• Nourish Healthy Relationships: Cultivating supportive, affirming friendships strengthens emotional resilience.

• Know Your Rights: Legal literacy builds self-assurance and combats societal silencing.

• Assertive Communication: Learning to express needs without aggression or submission fosters mutual respect. Assertiveness is not merely about “speaking up”—it’s a structured, empowering form of communication. It involves describing facts, expressing feelings, formulating clear requests, and stating consequences. This model not only supports interpersonal clarity, but reinforces personal boundaries, something many women are socialized to downplay.

Liberation Through Sisterhood

At its core, Check Me Like an Empress is not just a program—it is a reclamation of dignity. It affirms that emotional expression is not weakness, but wisdom. That femininity is not fragility, but force. And most importantly, that healing is not a solo act, but a collective revolution.

By naming shame, dismantling its roots, and building a culture of emotional safety, women involved in this movement are not just healing—they’re transforming. They’re choosing freedom. They’re choosing themselves.

Follow our jurney here or on social media, and remember: you are the Empress of your own life.

Cheers,

Edith